Putting Theory into Practice (or not)

Last Monday there was a meeting of a sub-committee that had been set up with the aim of improving the Club Run Experience. In line with some of the ideas that we came up with at that meeting, Peter Heath stood on the stainless steel bench in Cornhill, and called for a good clean Club Run, with no biting, eye-gouging or slapping. I'm only guessing here, my hearing aid was playing up. Since we were a group of 20, it was agreed (in the interests of safety, and the well-being of the increasing number of motorists who seem to be incapable of working out how – and when - to pass a line of 20 cyclists without forcing another motorist to stop) that we should split into two groups. Usually on an Espresso ride the problem is keeping everyone together, so this would be a novelty. I found that I had “been volunteered” to lead the front group and, thus, navigate an interesting route to Hollow Trees that would produce an overall mileage to match the 50 miles promised (on my behalf) by Peter. What could possibly go wrong?

The two groups set off down Southgate Street to that irritating nest of traffic lights. 'My' group sailed through. The other one didn't and, worse than that, I was quite unaware of this. Or of anything, other than getting up Horsecroft Lane with my lungs intact. If it can be easy to be unaware of a single rider slipping off the back, it is simplicity itself to overlook an entire group. We'd got ten riders – that would have been a good turnout in the olden times. It was a decent showing through this winter. I made my cunning and counter-intuitive left turn to take us down to Nowton – and (well out of sight of the junction) we got our first puncture. Richard Muchmore pointed out that we were lacking something. “What's that?” “The other nine riders. Peter's group”. Someone else pointed out that the other group were nowhere to be seen as we turned left. So that was it, really. Three miles into the ride and we'd split irrevocably.

Not wishing to get bogged down with details we carried on, down to Nowton (Susan says that she is reminded of a Yorkshire nudist colony whenever I see this sign. Nowt on? Geddit?) and up to Hawsted – with a pause for a second puncture then left (in case we ended up doing rather too much of the Suffolk Punch route). At one point we passed a grim-faced John & Connie Tapper heading back to Bury on their way home to Woolpit. We silently hoppe that we'll be doing the same at their age.

After the second puncture we began the “slow through and off” that had been discussed at Monday's meeting and which had been such a success on Wednesday. By and large this was a success for us, too. There were a few misunderstandings here and there, but it worked better than I expected. Eventually reaching Lavenham, then Brent Eleigh and up Milden Hill and on down to Boxford. I always expect to see a tearoom in this attractive village – and I never do. I haven't considered looking it up on the internet, either – which is really sloppy. I take the now slightly bewildered group up Cox's Hill – which was every bit as steep as last time I rode it – and headed roughly Hadleigh-wards before swinging North towards Kersey. Keeping an eye on the back of the bunch (every ride leader should do this once in a while) I see the leaders sweep round the corner and down towards the main road, instead of going through Kersey itself. Slightly piqued, I make them take the next left, back up to Kersey and then whizz them down to Lindsey then back up to the Monks Eleigh road, where seven of us went right for the half mile to Hollowtrees, and three went straight over to head straight home. The cappuccinos (Cappuccini) were assembling, and Peter's group was comfortably installed. The staff coped with the sudden arrival of 38 cyclists with that mixture of good humour and organisation that has won them our 'Best Café' award for each of the two years in which it has been awarded.

We seven left last, feeling slightly more magnificent after teas and scones, and headed home by going left out of Hollowtrees, first right down to Chelsworth, then Bildeston, right at Hitcham to take the road to Buxhall, down to One House and through Borley Green to Woolpit. I peeled off at Borley Green to Elmswell, and Great Ashfield to arrive at Norton with 58 miles on the clock. If I say that it was great to see DEANE HILL (a.k.a. Bungalow Bill) out on the road again, you have to believe that I really mean it.

SJH